Yankees!

Yesterday, my favorite baseball team won the world championship! The New York Yankees defeated the Philadelphia Phillies 4-2 in the best-of-seven World Series to win their 27th world championship.

You can criticize me all you want for choosing the Yankees as my favorite team. But as far as I'm concerned, I'm a baseball fan free agent, seeing as there is no Major League Baseball team in Salt Lake City. The Yanks have the biggest payroll and offered me the best chance at happiness, so I signed a contract with them. I give them my allegiance, and they give me a bunch of championships.

I hope that this breaks open the floodgates for my other favorite teams to win championships. But I am afraid that my efforts at cheering for the Utah Jazz are ultimately fruitless.

At any rate, I post a link today honoring the popular folk song "Yankee Doodle." I particularly enjoyed seeing how many verses there actually are. It would take ten minutes to sing this song. Here it is:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yankee_Doodle

To make this song even more special for me, I oftentimes sing it to my 10-month-old son Parker, but I change it to sing "Parky Doodle" or "Sparky Doodle" . I am not exactly sure why I do this, but I do it all the time.

I do the same thing to my 2-year-old son Hayden, only I sing his name to the "Banana-Fana" song. Again, I don't know why this has almost become a daily habit.

First Live Session

Yesterday evening, my wife Jessica and I went to do a session at the Salt Lake Temple. I had previously done baptisms for the dead there, as well as sealings. And, of course, I was married there. But until yesterday I had never done a session downtown. Joining us were my parents-in-law Theron and Cathy, and Jessica's sister Rebecca and her husband Lance.

This was also the first time I had done a live session, where temple workers "act out" the roles instead of having the temple attendees watch a video presentation. I laughed to myself a couple of times as I watched these old temple workers do their job.

Overall it was a very pleasant and spiritual experience, and I enjoyed it very much. There is a special spirit around this temple. I love walking around Temple Square, looking at the gardens, the buildings, the sculptures, the visitors' center. Everything. It is one of my favorite places in the world.

In other downtown news, I had a couple of other recent 'firsts':

1. I stepped foot in the Church Office Building for the first time a couple of weeks ago. The company I work for--Utah Educational Savings Plan--was invited to participate in the Church's benefits fair. While up there on the 26th floor or whatever it was, I had the chance to go to the observation porch up there, and it is a great view of Salt Lake City and the entire valley.

2. As part of my new calling as the Assistant Scoutmaster, I accompanied the Boy Scouts to the Utah State Capitol for the first time in my life tonight. That is an amazing structure. I enjoyed and appreciated all of the artwork and murals that were preserved. It is amazing how much Mormon history there is in the state of Utah, and how much it is celebrated. When they decided to renovate the Capitol, it would have been easy for them to eliminate the Mormon ties there and make it much more "politically correct." But they maintained the reflection of the true history of the state, which was awesome.

Finally, a new temple has been announced for the state of Utah! In last October's General Conference, President Thomas S. Monson announced a new temple to be built in Brigham City. This city is snugly positioned between the Ogden and Logan Temple districts, and now they get one of their own. I believe this will be the 14th temple in Utah. I imagine that I'll be taking my family to the open house when it is completed, which should still leave Ogden and Vernal as the only two Utah temples that I have not been to. Maybe I'll go to Ogden's on the way up to the open house in Brigham City.

When they announced it, I couldn't help but think that my Grandma Davis's sister Aunt Bev and her husband Uncle Len were smiling up in heaven. They lived in Brigham City and we visited them a few times when I was younger. I really looked up to them and am happy for them and their children and grandchildren who all have very strong ties to that area.

Other temples were also announced last month for Concepcion Chile; Fort Lauderdale Florida; Fortaleza Brazil; and Sapporo Japan. I don't know if I'll ever visit these temples in my lifetime, but I guess nobody ever knows.

Updated Temples List

Last Friday, my wife Jessica and I had the opportunity to volunteer at the open house of the new Oquirrh Mountain Temple. The public tours hadn't started yet, so we were dealing with the Very Important People who had special invitations and were given guided tours and a light buffet.

With the number of guests slowing to a trickle in the rainy afternoon, we decided to take a tour through the structure.

I don't mean to sound biased just because this is "our" temple. It really is incredibly beautiful. The chandeliers are all in the shape of some kind of star. The celestial room is, of course, wonderful. And the grounds are very nice. If this temple had been done before we got married, I think I would have tried to talk Jessica into getting married here.

One interesting thing about this temple is that it doesn't have the double-wide seat in the ordinance rooms like the Draper Temple has. I don't know what this means, but it must mean something...

With this visitation, I have now been to twenty temples! That is 2/13th of the worldwide supply. The updated list:

1. Bountiful Utah

2. Denver Colorado
3. Draper Utah

4. Idaho Falls Idaho

5. Jordan River Utah

6. Laie Hawaii

7. Las Vegas Nevada

8. Logan Utah

9. Los Angeles California

10. Manila Philippines

11. Manti Utah

12. Monticello Utah

13. Mount Timpanogas Utah

14. Oquirrh Mountain Utah

15. Provo Utah

16. Rexburg Idaho

17. St. George Utah

18. Salt Lake

19. San Diego California

20. Washington D.C.

I have been to 11 of the 13 temples in Utah--I've yet to visit the temples in Ogden or Vernal. On our vacation to Idaho last summer, we were going to stop by the Ogden Temple on our way up to Island Park, but opted not to because Hayden had finally fallen asleep in the car and we didn't want to stop and wake him up.

Who knows if I'll ever make my way up to Ogden. I've survived just fine for almost 30 years without ever stepping foot in that great city. Maybe I oughtta keep it that way.

CRITICAL UPDATE:

I thought of an easy road trip that would take a long time, but would knock off the following temples: Ogden Utah, Twin Falls Idaho, Boise Idaho, Columbia River Washington, Portland Oregon, Medford Oregon, Sacramento California, and Reno Nevada. Eight temples, just like that.

Elephant Ears

I've been looking forward to the day when my two-year-old son Hayden would get addicted to a movie and want to watch it over and over again. I had always heard of horror tales of guys at work getting Little Mermaid songs stuck in his head, or memorizing the full script of Lion King.

My son is into Dumbo right now. This did two things for me:

1. It brought back a whole lotta memories from when I was addicted to this movie in my childhood.

2. It caused me to do a Google search of "elephant ears". Well, what to my wonderful fascination did I behold...there's an actual plant called "elephant ears." Oh my!

I guess it's poisonous.

Random Link #19

http://www.mphase.net/

Can I still count New Mexico?

Last summer while we were visiting family in Blanding, we decided to make the trek to the Four Corners Monument. I had never been to New Mexico, and I felt the need to mark it off my States List. The full account of our adventure can be found here.

A couple of weeks ago, my world almost came to an end when it was announced that the Four Corners monument is actually in the wrong spot! The road we drove on to get to the Monument was US 160, which stays to the north and west of where the four corners actually meet. (The picture on the left is the recognized fraudulent site of the Four Corners. The picture on the right is where it should be...somewhere between the river and the road...ugh, this disgusts me. What is the next government cover-up that will be revealed?).

Can I still count New Mexico? If I DO happen to make it to all 50 states, I don't want my New Mexico trip to be fraudulent.

The states officially recognize the Four Corners monument as the boundary, but just to be safe, I will go to a BYU/New Mexico game sometime in Albuquerque.

Here is a great informational link about the Four Corners.

For now, I'll keep New Mexico checked off unless I hear otherwise about official recognized state lines. But this was a close one.

I Love Detective Shows

Since getting married to my wife Jessica almost three years ago (Happy Anniversary in a couple of weeks, Honey!!), I have been thrust into the wonderful world of Detective Shows. I had never watched Law and Order or Crime Scene Investigation before then.

I must admit, the shows are pretty entertaining, and I like to sit down with my wife and watch them, especially if there is also a banana split involved. But at the same time, these shows crack me up. I have listed below my six Detective Show Observations (notice I didn’t say Complaints).

Detective Show Observation #1: Everyone treats the detectives like crap.

This is the Observation I find most humorous. Since when did police detectives sink on the social totem pole to the point where we now associate them with door-to-door water filter salesmen? Why can’t people find time and respect for these detectives? Poor Detective Benson needs to follow these people around at their work, constantly harassing and interrupting them, in order to solve a murder investigation of one of their employees. And to add to the situation, the murder just happened to take place in the parking lot right outside the door, and this particular employee just happened to be working at the time and found the dead body. And they can’t find five minutes out of their busy schedule to talk to the detective?

I find this hard to believe. Who wouldn’t sit down with a detective and talk about the case? I don’t care if they’re guilty or not! If your son ever got murdered and the detectives dropped by with some questions for you, chances are you’d turn off the television and accommodate the murder detectives, right? After two minutes of them asking questions, would you really cut them off and say, “Listen, Detectives, I don’t have time for you right now. Do you think you can take this little investigation of yours to the donut shop and let me know when you have some real answers?” I mean, honestly….

Detective Show Observation #2: The detectives in these shows are literally superhuman.

First of all, they can find a suspect from anywhere. For example, they think an ex-husband is involved in a murder, and as they’re contemplating the evidence, they go to Central Park in New York City and read the newspaper while sipping a coffee. Out of the corner of their eye, they’ll see someone walking on the other side of the park, they’ll make eye contact with the person, and then the guy will bolt away. They caught him! Just like that!

The most ridiculous was an episode I saw where the detectives were trying to break a child slave ring, and they went to Puerto Rico to look for their main suspect. They got off the plane in the capital city, went to a big park, and instantly made eye contact with a little slave boy walking around. Somehow, both the detective and the little boy knew who the other was, and the chase was on. Man, that detective walked into Puerto Rico cold turkey and busted the ring within fifteen minutes. I bet he could walk into China and do the same thing. He’s good!

Secondly, these detectives can find any evidence in any crime scene within ten solid minutes. Is there a spot of saliva buried under two inches of grease in the oven? No problem. A blood splotch mixed in with a gallon of ketchup? Too easy. A hair found inside a stack of $20 bills inside a Monopoly box that is buried under nine hundred pounds of junk in the upstairs attic? No sweat (and somehow they can trace that Monopoly box to the exact employee who assembled it in Milton Bradley’s plant back in 1976…all in the database found on their handheld Blackberry). These guys can and will find everything. But, ironically, they can only accomplish these miraculous feats if they first turn off all the lights and execute the search with their mag-lights.

Detective Show Observation #3
In addition to having superhuman abilities, these detectives also have impeccable timing. EVERY time they break into an apartment, one of two conclusions is inevitable. They will either barge in at the exact same time that the key suspect is having intimate relations with another person (the scene shows the woman clinging to a bed sheet while screaming). Or they’ll bust the door open, look towards the back of the apartment, and see that the window is open. Of course, the suspect will be climbing down the fire escape ladder at that very second.

Every time. I mean, what are the chances? Just one time I’d like to see the detectives ram their way in, and then find out that the suspect just happens to be at work that afternoon. Or eating out with some friends that evening at a TGI Friday’s.

Detective Show Observation #4
How do the detectives always become a victim? The high-profile detective’s son just happens to be the one kid at school that gets kidnapped by terrorists. The coroner shockingly is given the corpse of her twin, who she didn’t realize was even dead. The SVU detective just happens to get raped by a serial rapist that she’s been trying to catch. The policeman’s wife is murdered. A homeless guy is involved in a murder, and there is a five-second pause as the camera pans closer to the actor’s face as he solemnly declares, “That man is my long lost father. I haven’t seen him in 44 years.” Commercial break. I mean, c’mon.

The best storyline is when the detectives are trying to catch onto the sick pattern of a serial killer, and they have a map of the city up with all of the murder locations plotted. “Hmmm,” Detective Walker will say. “It looks to me like the murderer is writing out the phrase “Who am I?” with all the murder locations.

“Yes,” chirps in Ice T. “But they forgot the dot at the bottom of the question mark. That must be where his next victim lives.”

“Let’s see,” mutters Walker as he types in a query on the computer. “The next victim must be at the exact location of that dot. And according to our database, that victim will be….…Detective Mayflower.”

“You mean your partner, Detective Mayflower?” asks Ice T.

“That son of a gun,” exclaims Walker. “Now this is getting personal.” They rush to the scene, where—according to the Impeccable Timing observation noted above—they will catch the suspect just as he is about to commit the crime.

The drama!

Detective Show Observation #5:
This is one of my favorites. It is when there is an argument between two agencies about who has jurisdiction over the murder scene and investigation.

Detective Morris drives to the scene of a high-profile murder, where he finds NYPD already there. He approaches a cop, flashes his badge, and says (while taking off his sunglasses and putting them in his shirt pocket), “Detective Morris…NSA. I’ll take over from here. You and your buddies can go ahead and pack your things. Your work here is done.” This is followed by a heated exchange between the NYPD detective and the NSA agent. It ends with the NYPD cop huffing away while proclaiming, “You’ll be sure to hear from the Mayor on this, and I’ll tell you what…the news ain’t gonna be pretty.” Detective Morris glares at him and confidently boasts while slipping his sunglasses back on, “Sir, the Mayor takes orders from ME. You can tell him whatever you want. But this is MY murder scene now.” Commercial break.

Do different jurisdictions get offended like this when somebody else takes over? Seriously, if I were the NYPD guy trying to solve the complex, high-profile murder case and knowing that I’d have to answer a flurry of media requests, I’d be overjoyed if the FBI or CIA took over and I could walk away from the whole mess without a worry in the world. I’d tell Detective Morris what I’ve found and whistle a happy tune as I drove back to the station. But maybe that’s just me….

Detective Show Observation #6:
The criminals are genuinely psycho. I suppose one could argue that to commit a murder or any number of crimes, you would have to be somewhat insane. But what gets me is the psycho motive behind each crime. When did crimes stop being committed out of simple hatred?

Nowadays, all the crimes are committed by the dead guy’s stepson, who has been having an affair with the victim’s ex-wife, and suspected the man of not only cheating on his mother, but of trying to get back together with his ex-wife (who, as mentioned above, is romantically involved with the killer). Or something like that. And when the detectives barge into his apartment, he will have just fled. But they will also discover a deep, detailed 2,550-page diary of his sick, voyeuristic exploits where he has been looking at schoolgirls for the past twenty years.

This confusing plot is only the tip of the iceberg. One notable episode I witnessed featured a woman killing her husband. But in the course of the investigation, they shockingly discovered that it was actually committed by her identical twin that nobody knew about. But to top it off, as the episode was ending, the viewer discovers that the crime was actually committed by a third identical triplet that nobody knew about!! What are they going to think of next?

Anyway, I love detective shows.

I love it when restaurants mess up

It is my opinion that one of the most unexpected happy surprises that can happen to you is to go into a restaurant and have them mess up your order. I say this because most of the time the restuarant will give you the meal or something else for free to compensate for the horrible inconvenience.

It has happened to us recently at Olive Garden, Red Lobster, and Texas Roadhouse. Last night Jessica was in need of a chocolate splurge, and I called Chili's to order one of those molten lava chocolate cakes, which would be the final thing I would eat if I knew I was going to die.

I went to pick up the dessert, and the manager came out and was acting very sorrowful, as if I was going to be so angry that I was going to throw a tirade and burn the place down. They were out of molten lava chocolate cakes. Truthfully, I didn't care and I said to just get a chocolate chip lava cake instead. The manager stopped me, and said, "Well, do you want to hear our offer instead?" They gave me the chocolate chip cake for free, and gave us a coupon (that happens to be expired) for a free chocolate cake in the future. So Jessica got her chocolate splurge (and a future chocolate splurge) for free.

When Jessica heard about this, she was jokingly about to call up Chili's to order another chocolate cake, just to see if they would give us two more free desserts.

I'm thinking in the future I might just order something super complicated, and if they mess up I would just act angry so that I can always get free meals.

I've been tagged! Six Things That Make Me Happy!!!!!!!

My wife Jessica tagged me, and being a fun-loving and active participant in the blogging galaxy, I feel bound to participate. If you don't mind, I will not tag anybody else, as I doubt six people will even read this post.

1. Doing things with my family. I especially like to dream up and plan vacations for us to go on, even if they are financially unreasonable at this time. For example, I have already planned vacations to San Diego, Yellowstone, Cleveland, Zions National Park, a super-duper road trip that would take us to quite a few temples that we've never been to before, and several different cruises. And it isn't the thought of the vacation or sight-seeing which makes me smile; it's the thought of cruising down the freeway with my family, singing along to that crazy love song where I overdramatically bellow out my "ooh ooh oohs".

2. Going to sporting events. As I mentioned in my "25 Random Notes" that was published exclusively on my Facebook page, my fatherhood dream has always been to take my boys to sporting events. BYU football games in particular. There's nothing quite like sitting in that massive metallic stadium on a slightly overcast October afternoon, with a hot dog and drink, and watching the cougars pummel whoever they are playing. And then talking football and life with my boys at my side. Oh, and this dream also involves listening to Greg Wrubell on the postgame coach's show. I also like going to baseball games with my dad and I want to take my boys to baseball games.

3. Doing things for my wife Jessica. As much as I like it when she does things especially for me, I think I am most happy when I plan things for her. I planned a little Valentine's surprise for her this year (note to Jessica if you read this: it is a small surprise; don't get your hopes up), and I gain a lot of satisfaction and happiness as I plan and present the Annual Weekend for Jessica. I might not be perfect at doing things for her, but I like to try!

4. The thought of school ending, forever. Do I need to post further on this? Only fifteen more classes....

5. Ping pong tournaments. We used to have ping pong tournaments at least once a year. And it was fun for the whole family to participate. Unfortunately, there was a reorganization in the YCOC (Young Competition Oversight Committee) last year, and now we never play. Oh well, I am STILL the holder of the Beast Jug. Ryan, my little brother, is in charge of organizing ping pong tournaments now and he hasn't done a very good job. RYAN, I TAG YOU TO DO A BETTER JOB!!

6. Temples. I am very grateful that we have temples on the earth today, which provide a way for me to be with my family forever. I am thankful to be sealed to my wife Jessica, and to my three little boys (Hayden, Scott, and Parker). And to my other family members as well. I get a very peaceful feeling when I think about temples, and that's why I like to visit them, even if I don't have the chance to go inside all of them. Hopefully my Temples List expands, though I like the fact that I have never been to the Ogden Temple. When I look at the temples I haven't been to yet in my lifetime, it is depressing to think that they are so far away and that I can't easily visit them. But having Ogden on my "haven't-visited-yet" list makes me keep thinking about it because progress seems reasonable. (speaking of which, when will I ever visit the Vernal Temple? Is there any reason why I would ever go in that general vicinity? I can't think of one. There's probably a better chance of me going to the Bolivia Temple somehow).

Updated Temple List

Yesterday, Jessica and I took Hayden and Parker and went to the open house of the Draper Temple. It was the first open house I had been to since going to the Bountiful Temple back when I was a teenager.

Anyway, the temple was, of course, beautiful. It was interesting to see how tight the space was inside...instead of long hallways like you'd see in the Salt Lake or Jordan River Temples, in the Draper Temple all the rooms are close together. The baptistry was on the main level as opposed to being in the basement like I'm used to. (CRITICAL UPDATE: THE BAPTISTRY IS NOT ON THE MAIN LEVEL. I WAS MISTAKEN. WE ENTERED THE TEMPLE IN THE BASEMENT. MY BAD.)

I have never done a session where you move from room to room. At the Draper Temple they have you move rooms once. One interesting thing I saw was that in the endowment rooms they have one seat in the back row which is larger than the otherS...about twice as big. I guess the Church is going the way of Canada and accomodating large people. I would guess that's why they are larger. Jessica thought it might be kind of like a love seat for a husband and wife to sit in together during the session. I dunno...there were no steel supports underneath, so maybe it isn't for fat people after all. (CRITICAL UPDATE: JESSICA WANTS TO MAKE IT CLEAR THAT SHE DIDN'T REALLY THINK IT WAS A LOVE SEAT. I'M SORRY, HONEY!)

The celestial room was beautiful. The chandelier is enormous! It was very peaceful. Of course, after being pretty good the entire time, Hayden chose to have a minor meltdown right as we were entering the celestial room. I guess that's what you get with two-year-olds.

I would encourage everyone to go to the open house, if you can. It is a great way to take your children with you to see the sealing rooms, and the celestial room, and to teach them about the temple. I mean, obviously Hayden won't remember going into the Draper Temple, but it was still a teaching moment, and I can't think of a much better place for a little kid to learn about the Gospel than at the temple.

So add Draper to the list of temples I've been to! Here is the updated list:

1. Bountiful Utah
2. Denver Colorado

3. Draper Utah

4. Idaho Falls Idaho

5. Jordan River Utah

6. Laie Hawaii

7. Las Vegas Nevada

8. Logan Utah

9. Los Angeles California

10. Manila Philippines

11. Manti Utah

12. Monticello Utah

13. Mount Timpanogas Utah

14. Provo Utah

15. Rexburg Idaho

16. St. George Utah

17. Salt Lake

18. San Diego California

19. Washington D.C.

This summer will be the open house for the Oquirrh Mountain Utah Temple. I am excited, as this temple is right down the street from us!